English Bandit News

Naked Cantonese Reveals That Hong Kongers Are The #1 Reason Students Give Up On Cantonese

nospam@example.com (Bandit Survey) — Mon, 24 May 2010 14:03:16 -0700

I've dug up something rather old, but very interesting nonetheless: In the first episode of the Naked Cantonese [site] podcast, a podcast for foreigners learning Cantonese in Hong Kong, Cecilie Gamst Berg explains of the Chinese that "they're putting up quite a struggle to keep a [sic] Caucasian foreigner from learning it [Cantonese]" and that the number one reason her students give up on learning Chinese is the active discouragement they receive from Hong Kongers (2:15). She also provides her own anti-English strategy.

Attack of the English Lovers in Kunming

nospam@example.com (Bandit Survey) — Sun, 04 Apr 2010 19:17:38 -0700

Matt of Lost Laowai, a long-time China resident based in Kunming, gives his take on being responded to in English in China. See also a good deal of interesting comments which follow the article.

English Bandit Merchandise

nospam@example.com (Bandit Survey) — Sun, 10 Jan 2010 10:43:29 -0700

I can't get over how hilarious this is, actual English Bandit merchandise! (Yeah I know it's automated, but, so what?)

From the urban dictionary, be sure to add better and expanded definitions for related terminology my dear passionate anti-bandits.

Terribly Good-Natured Victim in Japan

nospam@example.com (Bandit Survey) — Thu, 07 Jan 2010 19:35:56 -0700

This fellow seems terribly good-natured about the fact that he has become an opportunity (i.e. objectified, as they say pornography does to women) for the Japanese that surround him. He even goes so far as to advise that one be a good little lap-dog and speak English with the Japanese so that one's requests will be more readily attended to. As long as banditry awareness remains low, undeserving masses of English leeches will continue to be able to enjoy themselves by taking advantage of good-natured, nice people like Jonathan who have the misfortune of becoming targets because they speak English natively or fluently.

Please take the time now to help prevent the abuse from affecting your friends and loved ones! Forward this update to anyone you know who is living abroad. Thanks!

A sick new twist: Bully Host Families

nospam@example.com (Bandit Survey) — Sun, 05 Jul 2009 05:00:00 -0700

It's one thing when English Bandits make unwelcome approaches on the subway, in a park, in a shopping mall, or at school, but it is quite another when when faces the nightmare of having no refuge from their wicked terrorizing and lives together with one. I think even the most skeptical of skeptics who would otherwise give many "plausible" excuses justifying the behavior of language harassers will have trouble justifying the behavior of the sickening mother figure in: Bully Hostfamilies.

A favorite quote: "She must have licked her lips like a salivating dog being given a steak
and must have predicted that I would be all hers to be used for English
language practice."

The Nightmare Goes On...

nospam@example.com (Bandit Survey) — Thu, 02 Jul 2009 04:45:41 -0700

If you have any doubts about the threat of English Bandits to your well being, you need look no further for proof of the growing danger than: Jay Walker on the world's English mania.

While every country in the world is growing worse by the day, there can be little doubt that China is one of the greatest hotbeds of activity, a place where children are being reared practically from birth to harass us. If you can contribute in anyway to the cause of stopping foreigners (and especially Chinese) from learning English, please consider what you can do and join the fight!

Continue reading "The Nightmare Goes On..."

The State of English Banditry in Europe

nospam@example.com (Bandit Survey) — Thu, 12 Mar 2009 00:45:01 -0700

With much of this site in the past, banditry outside of Asia has been neglected. This update is intended to rectify that to some extent.

While not directly mentioning language bandits, there is a good discussion over on the How-to-learn-any-language.com forums about which countries in Europe have the least knowledge of English. Surely the less English overall, the less risk of being attacked! Spain, Italy, Portugal, and France all seem inviting choices.

France: A thread with tourists saying they get English in response to their French, but a long-timer saying he has never gotten an English response in Lyon.

Germany: Strangers and 'Denglish', getting English responses to one's German in Hamburg.

Updates: Arudou Debito deals with English attempt in Japan.

nospam@example.com (Bandit Survey) — Tue, 03 Mar 2009 22:56:05 -0700

Arudou Debito is a famous American-born naturalized Japanese who fights for the civil rights of Japanese residents not of Japanese race. His site can be found here.

In a recently released Youtube interview with Tokyo Sam, Debito reveals his technique for politely dealing with a (live!) English attempt by a Japanese waitress. (Starts from 1:10) Notice the confidence, body language, and polite manner + smile. This is an excellent technique for Japan!

This is all it takes: すみません　日本語で話してるんですけど.

You can read a short bit about a very similar technique Loco in Yokohama uses here.

About This Log

nospam@example.com (Bandit Survey) — Tue, 03 Mar 2009 22:42:00 -0700

This is a feed for anyone who is interested in keeping an eye on any new materials that appear on the internet which relate to language coercion, places in which languages can be learned by English speakers without the frustrations of harassment by locals, and in general English Bandits.

If by any chance you have happened across this page without first browsing the main site, please take a look at the English Banditry Survey site first. This is only a feed/page for short new updates as I discover them. If you find anything or are writing anything of your own which belongs in my list, I would be overjoyed if you send it to me for inclusion. A contact link can be found on my general blog.

If you don't already know, it is easy to keep track of updates here without regularly loading the page and refreshing. You can simply subscribe to the RSS feed with an RSS reader!